Whatever it takes. September 06 2018, 11787 Comments
This year’s theme for Bryer’s Song is a bit of a departure from past shirts which were inspired by special songs during his life.
Instead, the inspo kind of went down like this...
A few weeks ago, during an “all out” treadmill sprint at Orange Theory Fitness, it hit me. My legs were screaming “STOP”. My lungs felt taken by flames and yelled “SLOW DOWN!” Simultaneously, images of a specific hospital admission for Bryer began to flood my mind. The song that was blaring throughout the studio began to merge with the images. Whatever it takes.
I reached down and added speed.
He was directly admitted to the 10th floor (neuro) at Nationwide Children’s Hospital after an entire night of uncontrollable seizures ravished his body every 1-3 minutes. I was coming in to relieve Justin so he could go be with the other two kids.
As I walked down the hall toward his room, my heart started pounding as I saw the commotion outside his door. Justin had been too immersed in Bryer’s care to send a warning text of what was happening.
"What's going on?" I stated in my unintentional Mom-has-entered-the-room voice.
My eyes met Justin’s. It was a familiar exchange of helplessness. He was there at Bryer's side assisting the six others around the bed. I managed to catch Bryer between busy bodies. He was sheet white and panting for breathes. His eyes were opened and staring blankly off to the right, rimmed in red and purple from such a horrid night. He jerked in a repeated fashion. The seizures still had their grip, but now it seemed we were reacting to something new. His head was turned my way and I could see the sweat on his brow. Green bile oozed from his g-tube. It’s an image seared into my brain.
"Oh Jesus, help him." I whispered. I had a feeling come over me. He's dying. HOW MUCH MORE CAN THIS BABY ENDURE! I fled to the bathroom to grab a rough piece of toilet paper and wipe the tears that had started to spill. I paused and looked into the mirror. I had seen her face before...
When things get tough or when I want to quit, I think of that mom. Looking at herself in the mirror, she wiped her eyes, washed off her face, took some deep breaths and walked back into the room. She can do hard things. (Phil 4:13)
So CAN you. So DO you. WHATEVER IT TAKES. It’s what parents do. It’s what family does.
It’s what God did.
Go on and TRY not to run hard during this song:)
*The shirts are for purchase on this website. Www.bryerssong.com. All proceeds go directly to Nationwide Children’s Hospital where our son Bryer spent two-thirds of his 10 months and 26 days of life. We hope you will be inspired and uplifted as you wear this year’s shirts!